Does my identity dissolve into a cosmic "oneness" where I disappear — or do I stay myself?

“Do you think that we lose ourselves when we dissolve into the one? Or what's your thoughts on that?”49:10

“In some ways, it felt like I ceased to exist. I was not and nothing was at the same time. I felt like I was everything, everywhere, every time. I felt infinite and undying. I was and everything was, and there was no palpable distinction between I and everything else. The universe.”2:34

“We stay who we are; I did not lose my identity at all; I was still me; I still looked like me and felt like me and thought like me; I was still me.”36:30

“So there was this deep overwhelming sense of wholeness, of oneness, and of belonging. And at the same time knowing that you are everything in the cosmos in existence, but also knowing that you are this individualized piece of consciousness. So it was this beautiful dance, you know, between the the eternal and the unlimited the and the you know the infinite and the individualized sort of personalized soul and everything in between. So that was the most overwhelming experience. And while I was nicely floating in with”23:00

“And although I was still having a sense of self, I started to feel like if I was the dissolving, the whole.”12:17

“lose your sense of self. Correct. I did not I still knew who I was and I still knew who he was. We were still separate entities. Um, but there was a oneness that I experienced that we were entering. We entered this oneness and it was as we got into the oneness, as we got closer, I could see a light. Um, it's it's the only way I can describe it is it is a white perfect blemishless light. It is brighter than anything you can imagine, but it doesn't hurt your eyes. You can look at it and it's not hot.”35:59

“And in this place, this is where it gets really, really hard to try to describe each piece because it all blended together, um, as one. But I had this feeling that wherever I was, one, I didn't wonder where I was. I didn't worry about where I was. I didn't even really have much recollection about the physical body that I just came from. I had a sense of self. I, I knew who I was, that I had an individual sense of self, I remember that, but I remember so clearly that I was a part of this, what I call a oneness, in this void. Now, I call it a void, but the better way to describe it is like it's a void of anything that isn't complete. It felt like everything in this place was absolutely complete.”6:57

“Yes and no. Um, I felt, I felt throughout my experience that I was still very much uniquely me, and that my personality and who I was was intact, and that it was just my unique self. However, and I felt everyone else the same way.”25:40

“At that moment is when the sense of self started to dissolve, and I started to become one with the whole.”8:20

“At that moment is when the sense of self started to dissolve, and I started to become one with the whole.”46:23

“So you mean there was an experience of unity, but you were still yourself? Yes, exactly. This is what made it so thrilling, because I got the impression I was dissolving, but the 'me' was still here. I paid attention to whether myself was still existent, because there was the fear of losing this self. Fear is overstated. The feeling of fear doesn't exist anymore. You're wrapped in this very intense safety, so you can't get scared anymore. But curiosity is a driver.”37:04

“with everything. I started to feel the sense of dissolving with the whole and even this sense of self vanished. [music] I think the only thing I can bring to have more clarity about this is an analogy. So imagine there is a big stadium and in the middle of this huge stadium there's a little tiny box and all I thought I was is that box and suddenly that box opens up and you realize is nothing because it's nothing you thought you were but at the same [music] time is wholeness. is totality. It's an expansive [music]”15:57

“Did you feel that you had any of your own personality left, or did you feel totally merged in God?”6:12

“I had the feeling that I am part of the whole, vast cosmos, and then I am in inner resonance with it. Also, that I cannot separate myself from it, because I am a part of the whole, and with it, I am connected to everything, and also that everything is connected to everything.”9:10

“And I realized myself as a being of light, and it's when I also had that sense that I was dissolving with everything that was, and I was still having a sense of self at that moment, but even this dissolved, and I started to feel what, or I experienced what I call nothingness.”9:28

“I was me. I felt me. I felt what I looked like. It didn't change, but I didn't have a body. I was my vibration, the energy. And I instantly knew that we were all connected, that we were all one. Everyone's energy, everyone's vibration, that the divine beings and myself, we all had our own rate of vibration and our own color. And they weaved in and out of each other's. It was like a beautiful harmonic progression. And they made these patterns. And it was deeply profound and deeply beautiful.”33:39